The China Daily Baily Diary

There is scant regard for public safety by British standards around Lanzhou. Creeks full of untreated effluent flow into the Yellow River, where tourists are given rides on rafts and speedboats. The stink down by the Zhongshan Bridge last night was unbearable.

Kerbs seem to be at no mandatory height, appearing like small cliffs for pedestrians to ascend and descend, whilst they dodge the bikes, motor bikes and cars that regard the pavement (sidewalk) as just another fun place to drive an SUV. Asia in general has a lot of shocks for the first time Western visitor. Food safety is a problem too, with very poor quality oil and too much salt a signature in dishes at most lower class places. Asia all over really.

All this is bearable, and if a body is careful and maintains an optimistic outlook it probably won’t find it’s life terminated too prematurely. And who wants to drag on into a crippled, ignored old age anyway?

One thing that is very soft is a child’s skull in relation to the road when travelling at bicycle speed. More so at motor scooter speeds; around 25 mph around here it looks like. In fact, wearing one of those cycle helmets spawned from the aerodynamic requirements of the velodrome probably won’t help in a lot of bicycle crashes. An American football helmet or full face motorcycle crash helmet is better protection.

A voice crying in the Loess wilderness here we know, but this is a suggestion from the CDB to increase the safety of the innocent in Lanzhou. When motorcycling, wear crash helmets, and stop allowing children under 16 to ride pillion on motorcycles and scooters. And whatever you do, never, never ride one of those scooters with a driver up front and two little children facing each other on the pillion playing, as seen yesterday in a totally traffic law free Jia Yu Guan Xi Lu!!

In the UK, when motor cycle crash helmets became compulsory, one of the main advertisements to announce the law showed a hammer smashing into an apple, which duly obliged by becoming juicy pulp. That is exactly what happens when a child’s skull hits the road at motorized speed.

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Lanzhou has just rolled out a new fleet of No.56 buses, of interest here because if anything is new in China, it has to have some red decorations for good luck. The old 56 buses now ply the No.33 route, which used to be a trolley bus. Trolley buses no longer run here, which is a shame because they had a certain clunking charm. All Lanzhou public transport, including taxis, runs on Compressed Natural Gas, which does wonders for the air quality.

Something did wonders for he author’s cringe factor on the 56 bus today. Being old and stupid, he didn’t take note of the new grab handle arrangement - a bar just above head height.

As the bus neared the gate to the estate, he got up from his seat at the back and started to walk down to the central doors. The bus slammed to a halt when something - knowing this place probably a camel - leaped out in front of the bus to test its brakes. Consequently the author plunged forward and ended up in an embrace with a rather fetching young lady. Red faces and chuckles all round.

Further up the transport front, the province with Mt. Everest in it has been re-opened to tourists. The line to the aforementioned runs through Lanzhou. The CDB will report from there fairly shortly, weather permitting, so to speak.

Tags: Sights, Diary // 1 Comment »

The day dawned bright, birds sang, flowers scented the air. Time for a walk up Lan Shan. Or rather a cable car because Mei is a wimp.

The grass below the cable car shone with wildflowers and lovely long grass stems. Butterflies flew their jumbled courses amongst the meadow. We got to the top after 15 minutes and took our seats at a place with a view over the city. The birds, so many kinds, sang all around us. We ordered San Po Tai, the fruity tea that’s perfect for a long relaxing afternoon. Then a bowl of noodles with tomatoes and a dish of wild dandelion leaves, lightly cooked with a little chili pepper and sprinkled with vinegar.

On a brief walk along the hillside, this fledgling White-browed Laughingthrush kindly stood still long enough to be photographed!

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One of the greatest pleasures if you live in China is buying books on line. It’s a bit of an extravagance, but in the absence of libraries and any English literature apart from the classics in the Gansu Foreign Languages Bookstore stranded LaoWais have to have their little indulgences.

So when I rang Mei at lunchtime, she said she had received a package from Amazon, and I was pretty pleased because had arrived in record time and it had a couple of really good books about China in it. Or so I thought.

Imagine my consternation when I opened the package to find a set of five books on fashion! Amazon are usually very good, but this time they really got it wrong. It has all the hallmarks of a scene something like this.

“Look out Fred, that pallet’s a bit wobbly on the forks. Correction Fred, it’s not wobbly any more, it’s on the floor!”

“Oh dear Jim - look at all those books.”

“Yes Fred, but it’s no problem the packages bursting open. We have the addresses on the packets and all we have to do is match the books to the packing slips”

“Right Jim”

“Jim?”

“Yes Fred?”

“Have you had a look at these packing notes?”

“No, but I bet I’m just about to!”

“Bleeding things just say ‘1 EA GB Book’ for each item. We can’t match anything to anything this way.”

In a clear example of dear old Murphy’s law in rampant charge mode, Amazon’s packing notes didn’t mention the actual titles of the books in the order. Under the heading “Description of Goods” it simply read “Book”. So no-one could really work out what went where, and Fred and Jim are no doubt down the pub laughing the froth off a couple as we speak.

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Lots of the lovely ladies from the LSO, on a visit to a presentation of a new mobile stage to the Lanzhou Song And Dance Company today.

All told a short days work, with the inevitable presentations over by 10.30.

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We get seasonal fruit here in Lanzhou, mostly bought at ridiculously low prices off the back of hand barrows. Today it was the first sweet ripe peaches and some sort of mini nectarine/plum. The peaches squirted sweet juice everywhere when you took a bite, and the nectarines tasted fine as well.

The Yellow River (Huang He) at dusk (Huang Hun), from ZhongShan bridge, Lanzhou.

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Like most Orchestras, we are supported by considerable public subsidy. I learned a few days back why we were doing so few concerts. Just two since we returned in February in fact. Our subsidy has been sent to help the earthquake victims in Sichuan.

To fill in time and keep our hands in, we are rehearsing Shostakovitch’s 5th symphony. It has a screamingly high bass part, which leads me to believe that a bass player shopped old Dimity to the KGB at some point. The symphony is entitled “A soviet artists reply to just criticism.”

I have a few other names for it, I must admit.

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A couple of days ago, I had another interesting experience with Chinese bureaucracy, which only goes to confirm what I have been hearing lately. That is, that everyone in this country needs a job, and a mere spattering of LaoWai isn’t going to change the way things are done one iota.

In fact, the system here as it stands at the moment is designed to give as many people as possible as much paper as possible to push around at minimal expense; if they are educated enough to push the paper, that is. So, as another pile of paper is pushed towards another bureaucrat from a colleague, they are not inclined to think “how fast can I get this lot done”. Oh no. Instead they will tend to ask “But is this, after all, art?”

Still, to relate the story. My Canadian friend Charles, who is employed at vast expense by the Gansu Meteorological Bureau (GMB) to analyze data from an obscure river system in the Hexi corridor, needed to accumulate the numerous bits of paper required to enable the authorities, in the shape of the PSB, to issue him a residence permit for the duration of his contract, which is the last thing one acquires before settling down to - well - analyze data from obscure river systems or, in my case, play a double bass in an orchestra without the threat of deportation hanging over one’s head.

GMB haven’t actually employed a LaoWai before, but Mei and I were able at least to take Charles to the PSB and set the Mah Jong set rattling a few weeks back. He had 30 days to get this all sorted. The PSB gave him a list of stuff to get, and off he went to the GMB to study the river system and navigate the paper trail, a thing we all have to do in one way or another.

In the labyrinth, the Minotaur. We both trooped off to the PSB three days ago, and passed the wad of paper to the charming police officer who speaks a little English at the PSB visa section. Actually, the lads and ladies there are probably the most helpful in China, and if you want to extend a visa it’s probably worth a stop off on your way to Dunhuang to do it.

Our officer’s brow creased as she leafed through an impressively bound medical report on Charles from Gansu University Hospital.

“This isn’t from the ‘right place’,” she said apologetically, smiling demurely.

“You didn’t tell me there was a ‘right place’,” said Charles,. “I just asked at GMB and they told me to go to the hospital.”

“You know the ‘right place’, don’t you?” said the officer, looking at me. I nodded my assent. I have been there twice and I never forget a place. It’s not all that far from the flat. Which is a 30 minute bus ride from the PSB. It’s 33 degrees centigrade outside.

“Anyway.” she said, “I’m sure the ‘right place’ will accept this report.”
“Oh. OK then”

Long hot bus journey ensued, and after a long walk from the bus stop to the ‘right place’, we scaled the stairs to the 3rd floor and asked at the desk if they would accept the report.

“No. Come back tomorrow and get tested again.”

Charles nearly blew a fuse. Being x-rayed too often is a health hazard, after all. After a few words, we departed, and Charles rang his boss at GMB. We repaired to the flat for Long Jing tea. Soon Charles’ wife in Tianshui was involved, more phone calls were made (Chinese to Chinese this time,) and suddenly the HR chief from GMB agreed to accompany Charles to the ‘right place’ tomorrow at eight o’clock , and see about the tests.

The following day, I called Charles. He said that when the HR man showed up with him, the ‘proper place’ accepted the report without question and he doesn’t have to be tested again. Well “ring my chimes” as Dick (or Dan) used to say.

See what I mean? More interesting examples in a recent posting on the “Lost LaoWai”

Tags: Diary // 2 Comments »

Professor Walter Huber of Muskingum College doesn’t just know a thing or two about China, he’s a formidable burger spotter as well. Having spent the last few summers in Lanzhou for various lengths of time, he has had the opportunity to track down western food here. Yesterday he recommended the Lanzhou Legend Hotel’s Legendary burger, and tonight I tried it. Five Stars awarded. Huge burger and bun with additional bacon and egg, salad and chips. Heart attack city but hearty none the less.

What? I hear you ask. All that good Chinese food and you go for a burger? Well, most of me doesn’t get homesick, but my stomach has a mind of its own! Also, there is a little itch that has to be scratched with a knife and fork occasionally….burp…

Tags: Food, Diary // 2 Comments »

Yesterday was a festival (Zong Zi Jie) in which the worthy people of this country ate sweet rice wrapped in a leaf and hung up some decorations. Given the vast population, I wonder how many square feet (or metres if you’re a communist) of leaves were used in this festival? I expect an area similar to England and more.

Lanzhou is very pleasant at the moment with regular rainfall to keep the dust in check and pleasantly warm, sunny days. All the trees on the estate are in full leaf, creating a pleasant glade just outside the flat, ideal for reading.

I just finished “Kafka on the shore” by Haruki Murakami, which I picked up at the Bookworm in Beijing recently. It’s a fantasy story of a 15 year old runaway in Japan, which includes men who can talk to cats, a felicidal Johnny Walker and mysterious forces that cause children to fall into comas. Great read. During the trip to Beijing, I visited Pan Jia Yuan market , where 99% of the stuff is fake and the other 1% is being faked as you watch!

Spent a pleasant couple of hours by the Yellow River sipping cold drinks with my friend from the Gansu Meteorological Bureau and his wife on Saturday. It would have been even more pleasant had it not been for the beggars doing the rounds as usual down there. These guys must be paid to turn out like that; long pointy Chinese beards, crumpled caps, dirty grey clothing, wrinkled brown skin and worst of all persistence. Tip to travellers - never give them a thing, as they are mostly part of organised crime rackets.

Good places to give money include The Grameen Foundation, which gives small loans to poor people to get small businesses off the ground.

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